I hate when I have so much going on in my head that I can't sleep. There's a ton of stuff I'm thinking about, a lot about the future. There's a ton of uncertainty right now and I hate that. I can't handle uncertainty, I like plans...structure...things set in stone.
My boyfriend is going to be leaving for three months of training...and we don't know when. Once he gets back, he'll also probably be getting stationed on a different base. The only real way for us to guarantee getting stationed together is if we're married...which we've been talking about. Unfortunately, there's some circumstances that make getting married right now not a good idea, and we need to wait almost up until a week or so before he leaves. I also want to make sure we're doing it for the right reasons and not just because we're afraid to be separated.
Another thing is that I can't get orders for another base right now. I'm on an administrative hold because I'm involved in a court case. I can't leave the area until that's all taken care of. I'm hoping that it would go on either before he leaves or during the three months he's gone. That way once he comes back I'd be free to leave if we need to.
It just sucks not knowing any dates for any of this stuff. Things could happen quickly or it could be drug out for months and months. I just really hope things work out for the best...I guess that's all I can do right now.
Why do you blog?
Submitted by littleduckling.
Two reasons. Either to talk about things that I can't really talk about with other people or because I'm bored and want something to do.
I was just talking to my boyfriend about how bad it sucks having a phone that's only been out for a month or so because there's very few accessories available for it, like covers. My screen already has a scratch in it and I need something for it. Last time I looked there were only some silicone covers that were just ugly, but they finally made some hard ones in different colors, so I just ordered one in pink. I think it'll look cute!
If you knew you were about to lose your voice permanently, what is the last thing you would want to say?
Submitted by exer.
How much I love certain people in my life. I wouldn't want to lose the last chance to let people know.
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There are times when being away from home is harder than it should be. It's not the place I miss, it's the people. I love being on my own and not living with my parents, and I'm happy being out here, but there are times when you really need those people in your life...the ones who really, really actually give a shit.
I always took for granted being asked every day by my parents how my day was. Once you go days without being asked that by any one, you realize how much it actually means to have someone ask, and really care about the answer. I wish I wouldn't have always just said 'fine'. I wish I would have returned the question.
I took for granted being within ten minutes of all my friends. Once you leave them all behind, even though you will see them again, you know it will never be the same. You also realize that even though you'll make new friends, you can never come close to having that same bond with anyone else. The friendships that are going on eleven years can never be replaced. I wish I would've spent more time with all of them, making those eleven years even more memorable than they already are.
I took for granted being able to be with my sister. It was somewhere among the fifth or sixth time going to Walmart by myself that I realized I missed our late night trips there. Maybe it was when I cried because I didn't get to see her try on and buy her wedding dress that I realized I cared a little bit more than I let on. It's not until you're really seperated that you realize a girl really is nothing without her sister. I wish I would've gone with her every time she asked. I wish I would've always let her know that I'll always look up to my big sister.
I knew I would miss everyone back home, I just never thought it would be this much. If you're lucky enough to be close to the people you really care about, the ones who can't be replaced, you should always let them know. Never miss a chance to let someone know that you care. Your chances to may be gone before you know it.
I decided to get rid of all my previous entries. They had started to collect dust and not much else. So, I start fresh...and for those of you who don't know who I am, let me introduce myself...
My name is Melissa. I'm 21 years old and was recently relocated to the state of New Jersey. I'm an active duty member of the United States Air Force. I'm originally from South Dakota and find life on the East Coast to be relatively exciting.
Those are the basics...for the details, you'll just have to stay tuned.
So cute! I want one! Dang I wish they had those in Canada!! <3 read more
on Pink and pretty...